I haven’t blogged in awhile because in all honesty I didn’t know what to say! Our life lately has been so insane that we didn’t know if we were coming or going. First of all, I need to share with you our amazing news.
I am pregnant! We decided to wait awhile before posting the information online, so I am already 22 weeks along. The baby is due on June 2. And surprise–we are having another boy! We would have been excited to have a girl, but we are thrilled to be having a third boy! Boys can be such a fun, loud mess. I expect our house to be crazy but happy!
And now for the most obvious question: what about our adoption? This is part of the reason why I waited so long to blog. I hoped to have a better, less complicated answer. Unfortunately that hasn’t happened! We are still completely committed to adopting. Adoption for us was never about just wanting another child. We have been called by God to adopt and that calling hasn’t changed. The only question in our minds is the Lord’s timing.
We are open to twins, so we would be perfectly happy to have a biological child and an adopted child that are very close in age. Unfortunately, our agency doesn’t share our viewpoint. The agency’s policy is that an adopting family’s youngest child has to be 18-months old before their profile will be shown to birthmothers. Our two oldest boys are only 19 months apart to the day, and our hope is that our next two will be just as close. That way everyone gets a buddy. To follow through with our original plan, we would have to change agencies and get to experience a lot of the paperwork and fundraising stress again. We will have to wait and see if that is the Lord’s plan.
I want you to understand that our new biological child and our future adopted child are not interchangeable in our minds. As overjoyed as I am over the new life inside me, I long for our adopted baby. I know that this may not make sense to you because we have never met this child; we haven’t seen a picture or been connected with a birthmother. And yet this child is in my heart as much as my other three. I feel as though one of my children is missing, and my heart is breaking over the fact that we are apart.
Everything is different now, but we trust in the Lord’s specific plans for our family. We know that He has a time and purpose for everything. We will keep you updated as He continues to lead and provide for us. In the meantime thank you for your prayers and support. And we can’t wait to introduce you to our new little one!